soporeffective | 001 ♑ [video/text + action for new bark]

[The video feed switches on, but for some reason, Gamzee starts to type instead of speaking, not even looking into the camera. Perhaps he hadn't noticed he'd initiated the video function, as well. He's got a messy mop of curls on his head, and they insist on falling in his eyes every time he brings that painted face down to look at his Pokégear.]

HeYyY My rIgHtEoUs fReAkY-DeAkY PiNkLaNd iNhAbItAtInG MoThErFuCkErS. :o)
Or wHoEvEr aLl mAy bE At bEiNg tHe mOsT MoThErFuCkIn lUcKiEsT Of rEcIpIeNtS At mY TeXtUaL WeLl-wIsHeS.
I Be aLl sEeMiNg tO Be aT Up aNd hAvInG WhAt's aLl gOtTa bE BeInG LiKe, ThE MoSt wIcKeD Of hAlLuCiNoGeNiCaLlY InDuCeD PiE DrEaMs a mOtHeRfUcKeR WaS EvEr aLl tO Be uP AnD HaViNg fOr hImSeLf, HaHaHa!
I WaSn't eVeN AlL KnOwInG WhAt i cOuLd bE Up iN A PlAcE FoR ImAgInInG BeInG OnE Of tHeM WhO'S AlL SkInNeD In tHe bRoWnY PiNk sHaDeS.
WhAt aLl a bRoThEr's tHiNkPaN CaN Be gEtTiNg aT BeInG ImAgInInG In cOnTiNuEs aLl tO Be a mOtHeRfUcKiN MiRaClE EaCh aNd eVeRy gOd dAmN DaY! :oD

[He looks genuinely carefree, a big ol’ grin slapped on his face. Soon enough, however, his expression falls into that of a more thoughtful nature, though it retains all of its pleasantness.]

BuT, uHhH...
CoUlD I AlL MaYbE Be aSkIn oN A LiTtLe mOtHeRfUcKiN AsSiStAnCe iN, lIkE, wHaT ThE FuCk i'm tO Be uP AnD DoInG AbOuT WoRkIn tHeSe fUnKy hUmAn dIgS?
AnD FuRtHeRmOrE, mAyBe bE GeTtInG YoUr eXpLaIn oN At mE WhY AlL I GoT A FaT PiNk mOtHeRfUcKeR AlL PlOpPeD Up nIcE AnD CoMfY In mY DaMn lAp?
AlL I WaS DoInG WaS GeTtInG My bOnK AnD PrOd oN At tHe fUnNy mOtHeRfUcKiN JuGgLe bAlLs i gOt hErE WiTh mE WhEn dUdE Up aNd iNvAdEd mY MoThErFuCkIn bUbBlE LiKe hE AlL WaS OwNiNg tHe hIvE.
NoT ThAt iT AiN'T No tHiNg, I AlL Be a bRoThEr bElIeViNg iN ShArInG ThE MoThErFuCkIn sPaCe. :o)
I ThInK ThErE WaS SoMe mAnUaLs oR FuCkIn sOmEtHiNg bUt i aIn't sUrE WhErE AlL ThOsE DuDeS WeRe tO Be gEtTiNg uP AnD At.
ThInK I AlL WaS To dRoP ThEm wHeN I SpIlLeD ThE StUfF OuT Of mY HeLlA DoPe bAcKpAcK.
If nOt, It aIn't nO BiG!
I Be aLl sUrE In tHiS MoThErFuCkEr fIgUrInG ThE NoIsE WhAt's lIkE ThAt iS AlL MoThErFuCkIn sTrAiGhT OuT AnD ShIt!
MiRaClEs dOn't fAiL To bE GeTtInG ThEiR HeLp oN At nO MoThErFuCkEr iN NeEd!

[Gamzee takes a moment to visually assess his message, eyes slowly drifting across the screen before becoming obviously distracted halfway through and flicking up to stare at his surroundings. The feed remains on indefinitely.]

☮☮☮

[Later, he had taken to walking. Gamzee had never before tread with feet whose toenails did not push up against the tips of his sneakers. Never before had his head felt so weightless, bereft of its usual pair of massive horns and pointed ears. He could have likened it, perhaps, to the feeling of disjointed euphoria he’d always experienced from a choice tin of sopor – that first taste when you know the shit’s still hot but you all get to be bringing it up in for a taste anyways? Yeahhh. That’s the one. In fact, that wasn’t far off from what he’d been telling himself ever since he’d woken up in this place, disoriented yet pleasantly curious. He’d been briefed about his stay and his new partner, information he paid little attention to, because rules and regulations were just stuffy drivel that no decent whimsical motherfucker ever was to be getting his follow on of. Besides, the scenery and lushness of the land here was too distracting for him to have listened to that hoofbeastshit even if he’d wanted to.]

[Attempting to coerce any sort of conversation, decipherable or not, from the fat, pink creature that was apparently under his immediate supervision proved to be a fruitless endeavor. The only responses he got from it were extremely drawn-out and seemed to tax the thing more than Gamzee was interested in doing. It wasn’t chill to be all forcing a bro to be speaking when all he wasn’t feeling on doing it, for sure. He figured he’d supply the conversation for the both of them, hoisting the little dude (who was decidedly not little) up into his arms and lugging it along as he wandered down the 29th route.]

So, like, you all get your motherfuckin’ live on at what’s this greeny-planty joint all’s at being?

[He began, turning a blithe gaze towards the treetops and carrying on barefoot. His things had been packed away in the bag slung over his shoulder, but Gamzee had neglected to zip it up properly. As a result, all of his belongings were tumbling out of the knapsack as he continued down the trail.]

Or maybe you all is fuckin’ just being a dopey dreamer like this motherfucker? Get your wake on up in here like all just was to be doin’?

[He jostled the critter in his arms, attempting to elicit a response. It stared blankly ahead, swishing its tail laboriously.]

Bro of silence, ain’t you motherfuckin’ just? Nah, no worries, my wicked motherfucker. You ain’t gotta be speaking for all the motherfuckin’ miracles to get their hear on of you. Miracles be a funny motherfucking thing, in that they all be having their notice going of you when all you be least expecting it. Be what’s so fuckin’ great on them brothers, you know?

[He laughed to himself, readjusting his grip on his new friend as his new, pink-skinned feet turned a more familiar gray from the dirt and dust they were collecting.]

No offense to your ass, motherfucker, but I all be hoping I be snappin’ up out this halluci-motherfucking-nation sooner than fucking later, ’cause now that I be thinkin’ on it, I was pretty sure on what I got somethin’ important goin’ on that fucking needs all going back to...

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

From:

timelymaid

karkat he has berries saved to eat
ill let you deal with that just in case my warning is ignored
youre louder about warnings than i am
:D

[ good luck and all!!

she surrenders any further responsibility on this matter, oh great leader. ]

From:

usedshooshpap

WHAT THE FUCK, ARADIA.
I'M NOT THE LEADER ANYMORE.
IT WAS ROSE THE LAST TIME I KNEW.
BESIDES, WHAT DO I LOOK LIKE? THAT CLOWN'S MOIRAIL?
THAT SHIP HAS SAILED AND SUNK INTO THE DEEPEST TRENCH IN THE OCEAN.

From:

soporeffective

hAhAhA WhOa wHaT.

From:

papshooshing

OH FUCK MY LIFE.

From:

timelymaid

id like to go on record stating that was not at all my fault
0u0

i dont know why i keep trying that it never looks any better
:D
there we go

From:

papshooshing

FUCK YOU IN THE EYE WITH A RUSTY SPOON.

From:

timelymaid

sounds painful ill pass

From:

papshooshing

THAT'S KIND OF THE POINT, GIGGLES.

From:

timelymaid

gee really
gosh id missed that entirely!!!
thanks for explaining captain obvious :p

From:

papshooshing

YOU ARE AN ASSHOLE AND I HOPE YOU DIE CONVULSING ON THE GROUND
OR YOUR DEATH COMES IN THE FORM OF SUFFOCATION FROM CHOKING ON YOUR OWN GRINS.
>:P

From:

From:

soporeffective

We aIn't gOtTa mOtHeRfUcKiN GeT Up tO BeInG HaViNg nO DiScUsSiOnS AlL On tHiNgS WhAt yOu aIn't aLl bEiNg wAnT To sPeAk aT.
Or, Uh.
I GuEsS, lIkE.
ThInGs yOu sEeMiNgLy aIn't wAnTiNg mE PrIvY To. :oD
I AiN'T No mOtHeRfUcKeR To wRiNg mIrAcLeS FrOm wHeRe tHeY AiN'T RiPe aNd rEaDy tO Be mOtHeR FuCkInG WrUnG.

From:

papshooshing

IT'S JUST COMPLICATED.
LEAVE IT AT THAT.

From:

timelymaid

have we crowned you emperor of metaphors yet
although wed have to have you compete against dave

anyway

you can tell rose about it then!
though i dont know that she would care
rose if youre reading this would you care if gamzee ate berries
thanks for answering this very important scientific survey
or not if you dont

im not his moirail either but do we really want him to get sick
that seems like bad friendship skills karkat

From:

papshooshing

THIS ASSHOLE HASN'T BEEN MY FRIEND IN A LONG TIME, ARADIA.
MAYBE NOT *THIS* GAMZEE
BUT HE KIND OF LEAVES ME HIGHER AND DRIER THAN JOHN USING HIS WINDY POWERS ON WET LAUNDRY MIDAIR.

From:

timelymaid

so thats a yes to we want him to get sick then
duly noted

i dont think i can personally hold things he hasnt done yet against him
though we can always see if he does anything to be held against him now
i mean its not like we have sopor here so thats always a possibility
though i doubt id hold that against him either im really sick of being upset at people about the stupid things they do
its no fun and always ends badly
usually in death
including my death hahahaha

so
are you okay?

From:

papshooshing

I'M SAYING THAT NEUROTIC BASKET CASE LIKELY HAS SOLID STEEL LINING AROUND HIS GUT.
THE GUY EATS SOPOR ALL DAY WHICH HAPPENS TO ALSO BE POISONOUS.
I DON'T THINK WE REALLY HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT HIM GETTING SICK.
IT'S NOT LIKE WE CAN STOP HIM FROM BEING AN INEPT DOUCHEBAG AND EATING IT ANYWAY EVEN IF WE WARN HIM.

IT'S ALSO NOT ABOUT HOLDING GRUDGES, ARADIA.
I'M NOT MAD AT HIM FOR WHAT HE'LL DO.
FUCK, I'M PRETTY MUCH OVER EVERYTHING THAT ERIDAN HAD DONE TOO.
THAT ALL SEEMS SO GODDAMN LONG AGO AND A DECENT REFLECTION UPON THOSE PAST EVENTS JUST IS STUPID.
I DON'T WANT TO GET ALL PHILOSOPHICAL ON ANYONE'S SHITSTAINED ASS.
IT WAS A TOXIC RELATIONSHIP. MAYBE I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN THAT FROM THE START, BUT REALLY THE FAULT THERE IS MINE.
TRUTH IS, I KNOW THAT CAN TURN OUT VERY DIFFERENTLY HERE. I DO.

SO I DON'T REALLY KNOW *WHAT* TO THINK AT THE MOMENT.
SEEING HIM LIKE THIS BRINGS BACK SOME GOOD MEMORIES AND KIND OF MAKES ME WISH HE WAS STILL THIS PERSON.
MAYBE A TIME PLAYER CAN'T REALLY UNDERSTAND THE CONFLICTING FEELINGS THE REST OF US UNIMPORTANT PLAYERS WHEN MEETING UP WITH THOSE THAT ARE NOT FROM OUR TIME PERIOD.

From:

timelymaid

thats a fair point
about the warnings being ignored
im not sure if iron stomachs count as a power that would be taken away or not though
so it seemed concerning

i dont care if you get philosophical on me
i have time to listen
its not like im doing much right now im just between cities :o
so conversation is nice

i can understand missing people karkat
and wanting to see them as they were or will be!
its a perfectly normal emotion regardless of the aspect of a player you know :p
its not like i dont miss the future versions of people or even the past versions of them
i just dont mind taking people as they come or as i find them
so perhaps the lack of conflicting feelings is just that i accept conflicting feelings exist!

From:

papshooshing

IF YOU CAN ACCEPT CONFLICTING SHIT, THEN THAT MEANS THERE'S REALLY NOTHING AT CONFLICT ANYMORE, ARADIA.

From:

timelymaid

not really
it just means that youre okay with it!

From:

papshooshing

SO WHAT.
ARE YOU SAYING I SHOULD CHASE HIM DOWN FOR, LIKE, THE THIRD TIME OR WHAT?

From:

timelymaid

um
all i was saying was maybe we should do something about the whole berry eating intent karkat!!

i think you should do whatever you want though
if youre asking me if i think you should start a relationship with gamzee
id say taking the advice of others on whether or not you should do something is sort of stupid
you should do whatever makes you happy when it comes to relationships
its not like having feelings for someone means you automatically have to do something about those feelings
sometimes things just wont or dont work out!
and that is okay

its just a matter of what you want to do
and its not like you really need to do anything right now??
i mean literally this is not a time sensitive matter and all we need to be doing is feeding him the basics of the johto welcoming committee thing
you dont need to have life changing emotional revelations together or something